I am a huge believer that we all need people. We need those people that will always be in our corner in our lives that will help us through thick and thin that we can talk to and be ourselves with. People need people. Sometimes we may feel we don't but we do we need interaction with others we need to feel loved, feel important and feel like we have a place in the world. These people are family, friends and even our day to day acquaintances. People need people and that is ok. That being said that will never go away, that is a part of the human nature, but I have come to learn as I get older, go through some things and grow that even though we need people in our lives sometimes we need to focus on ourselves too.
Focus on ourselves? How do you do that? I've always thought that was being selfish. It isn't. I am learning it is not selfish to take care of you. You need to take care of you, do what makes you happy and love yourself. I'm not sure if I've ever said that I love myself. That feels weird. But why? How do you expect for others to love you, be there for you and be friends with you if you don't even like you. That is a crazy way to think about it huh? That was asked to me and it really got me thinking. I have to believe in myself, like myself, like who I am and where I am at in order to be happy, in order to be the best person, wife, mother and friend to those around me.
SHOES: Nike || LOCATION: Trolley Square || PHOTOGRAPHER: Tyler Ulrich
Focusing on you even though it is needed and encouraged it is hard. It is hard to just let go, because I am such a perfectionist, but you cannot get all caught up in your head like that. Stretch yourself. Push yourself. Do what makes you happy. Love on your kids. Do something nice for someone. Do something for you. Even if that is making a treat and watching your favorite movie so you can relax and be re-energized to take on the day or your tasks is sometimes the best thing you can do.
I am pretty notorious for being really hard on myself. I know that is somewhat normal at times but I have been told I am unhealthfully hard on myself. I know thats not ok. I kept saying that is just me and I don't know how to change it, but as time goes and the more I live my life and people who care about me tell me it isn't ok I know its time to work on it. I think the first step was figuring out why I am so hard on myself. Well another struggle I have is I care too much what others think of me. I know everyone cares what others think, but I just can't seem to let it go. I want everyone to like me. I take it super personal if someone doesn't and get very heartbroken over others opinions of me. If they don't like me I must be no good, if they don't like me I must not be worth anything, if they don't like me I mean maybe they are right. That isn't ok. Some people just don't click, we just don't get along with everyone. I still would love people to love me for me but if they don't I cannot dwell on it so much that it changed my self worth and the way I think and feel about myself. I know who I am, I know what I stand for and my goals and dreams and that has got to be enough for me.
So what I am I doing to focus on me? That is a great question. I have good days and I have bad days just like anyone else. I do want to focus on me and I am in the process, but I am also trying to enjoy the process. I am trying to breathe and appreciate each moment. Appreciating where you are at is one of the hardest things but something that is very important to be able to continue to grow and move forward.
I am just taking it day by day. I am trying to focus on my relationship with christ and pray more, I am trying to be more patient and spend more time on my kids, I am trying to be more positive and thankful for the blessings that have been given to me, I am trying to take a little time for me each day, I am trying to stress less and smile and laugh more. I am continuing to work hard and do what makes me happy, share my passions with others and have fun in all the mix.
Life is hard enough, people can be harsh enough. Lets just love a little more, be kind a little more to others and to ourselves. Be nice to that person you see in the mirror each morning. Be kind to that person and just see what happens. I am still working on this it is an ongoing battle of mine but it is worth working on and bettering your relationship with yourself and others.
So go right now and write something or a few things or a lot of things that you love about you! It is love month. Love yourself. Love others! Be kind.
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