Saturday, January 14, 2012

It seems I have fallen off the face of the blog world

I know it seems as though I have disappeared since the holidays hit
And I am so sorry and a little sad about it
It all started in December when my hubby was out for a 3 week break
We had family in town, had a blast with no responsibility 
and was getting ready for Christmas 
It was amazing and I loved all of the time with family

Now it is Jan 14 and I have done a total of 4 posts this whole month
I am a slacker but it isn't because I don't want to blog
or because I cant think of things to share with you
It is because I am busy but not just any kind of busy 
or not just a oh the day slipped away from me type of busy

I started my student teaching this month
And for all of you teachers or those of you who have done student teaching
know how crazy, stressful and busy it really is
And I am also a mom so it is like I am a working mom right now
I don't know how all you working moms do it
I just started and I am already counting down the days to April 20th 
when I am done and back at being a SAHM to my little Maddux

I still plan on blogging I just did my first week
at student teaching so it is just still new to me and it will 
take some time to get used to managing my time a different way
I do not handle change or leaving my baby all day very well
but I know I just need to get this last little step in my education complete
So I can officially be done and have all those
years of college worth it 

Am I excited to student teach? honestly no
I am terrified
It is out of my comfort zone, not because of the kids 
but because of the mentor teachers watching my every move
I hate that I am leaving Maddux throughout the day
I miss being a SAHM and I totally took advantage of it 
I don't feel qualified
I don't feel confident
I don't know if I can really do it 
But I am I am going to do it even if the stress and fear kill me
I am going to get through these next three months 

Do I plan on teaching right away?
No I love being a stay at home mom
Love it and it is what I want to do 
Yes I did get a degree and yes it is important to me to finish 
but that is more for a just in case if I NEED to get a job I will have a 
degree in something that I can 
it is also so when my kids are in school if I want to work then 
I will just work when they are in school and will have all the days off they have
including the summers 

What I am student teaching in?
My degree is in Physical Education 
and Health in my major
so I am student teaching in both subjects 
I will be teaching 3 classes of each, have two different mentor teachers
and am at Murray High School 
Another reason why I am terrified is I did not major in PE
because I played every sport in high school 
in fact I was just a gymnast and ran track
I am a PE major because being healthy and exercising is very important to me
So when I found out I was student teaching in sports skills 
instead of fit for life like I thought I just about died
so out of my comfort zone
But I will get through it and if I can teach sports skills 
then the rest should be a breeze. 

This week all I did was observe 
but I am stressing about if I will be ready when the 
time comes I am teaching on my own
Next week I will be co-teaching which is good but also 
a bit awkward when do I talk? did I talk enough?
you know stuff like that
Then after I co-teach for a whole unit which is just a few weeks
I will be teaching and planning lessons on my own 
Also while I am student teaching I have to be working on a HUGE 20
page paper work sample that I will be turning into SUU at the end of my student teaching
Yeah I hope I make it through all of this 
April 20th please come fast and please be worth it all

So now I just need to tell myself I can do this
I can do hard things
There is no reason why I should be stressing so much I am making myself sick
Yes it is out my my comfort zone but when I am done
and have earned that teaching license it will mean more to me 
that I did it and it was hard than if I just breezed through it all
I need to believe in myself
I need to make some mistakes and learn from them
I need to really listen and learn from my mentor teachers
I need to prepare
I need to relax
I need confidence
I need to suck it up
HERE is to student teaching, being awesome and gettin her done!

I do have to mention how lucky I feel that
even though I have to leave Maddux and give up 
being a SAHM for a few months he is so many great hands while I am gone
On Mondays and Tuesdays Ty only has one class so he
plays with Maddux most of the day
and my amazing mom drives 45 minutes to my house to watch M
while Ty and I are both gone on Mondays 
Wednesdays Ty's amazing grandparents are watching him all day
On Thursday Ty's aunt is watching him and he gets to play with his little 
friend Carson and on Fridays my mother in law
switched around her whole work schedule to take Maddux 
Seriously all these people have saved our lives 
they are amazing and Maddux will have a blast with them all 
Now I need to think of a really awesome thank you gift for them all
when I am done. Ideas are appreciated :)

I will be getting back to blogging and yes even 
before April 20th I will find time to
why? because I really love it and 
I love to have a creative outlet so if I find some time to craft
I want to share it with you all
Thank you to my readers
I hope you understand 
I hope you check back often 
and I hope you stick around and continue reading

Also all you teachers out there
Any advice for student teaching?
What are your stories?
what worked?
what didn't?
what helped you through it?

3 comments:

  1. I am not a teacher, so I can't help you there, but I want you to know that I will be here no matter if you write 6 times a week or 6 times a year. I love your blog. :) Good luck on your new venture! And I hope it flies by so that you can be at home with your little guy again!

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  2. Student teaching was hard for me in that same way of having other teachers and mentors assessing your every move. It's tough, but it isn't impossible. Make sure to keep yourself healthy (both my husband and I developed odd anxiety during that time).

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  3. I did six weeks of student teaching while I was at BYU, and it was tough but so worth it! I was scared out of my mind, but the kids were so sweet - they have no idea that you are nervous, and they are just trying to make it through the next hour. I think they like student teachers better than their regular teachers because it's a change! Good luck; I know you will do great!!

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